


Wheel In The Sky

by theandrogynousdragon



Category: The Fall (TV 2013)
Genre: Anal Sex, Blood and Gore, Catholicism, Depression, Drug Use, Drunken Confessions, Dubious Consent, F/F, F/M, Female Jewish Character, Gun Violence, Hallucinations, I Wrote This Instead of Sleeping, I'm Sorry, Implied/Referenced Character Death, Implied/Referenced Sexual Assault, It Gets Worse Before It Gets Better, Jewish Identity, M/M, Mental Instability, Moral Ambiguity, Moral Dilemmas, Multi, Open Marriage, Oral Sex, Polyamory, Post-Traumatic Stress Disorder - PTSD, Public Sex, Religion, Rough Sex, Semi-Public Sex, So much WORSE, Suicide, Suicide Attempt, Swearing, Temporary Character Death, This Is Why We Can't Have Nice Things, Threesome - F/F/M, Threesome - F/M/M, Time Loop, Time Travel, Vaginal Sex, also, and that's pretty much it, asking for a friend, basically tom is horny and bored and decides to have fun with it, but literally it's just: they fucked, consider that my coming out y'all, is it an attempt if he dies but time resets?, it gets dark guys, none of the sex is explicit because the author is ace and has no idea how to write sex scenes, or least he has less of a good time as it goes on, poor tom does not have a good time in this, so a suicide bomb i guess?, the bad guy gets murdered alot, there is alot of sex in this i'm so sorry, tom blows himself up in an abandoned car park at one point, whoop there it is
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-04-01
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-02-28 17:28:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 1,070
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23430952
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theandrogynousdragon/pseuds/theandrogynousdragon
Summary: Thomas Anderson dies from a gunshot wound on the sunny morning of May 5th, 2012....He wakes up in his own bed on the night of April 16th.
Relationships: alot of one night stands
Comments: 2
Kudos: 8





	1. The Slope

**Author's Note:**

> This is what my brain comes up with at four in the morning on too much caffeine. I am. So sorry for this absolute monstrosity.

Tom knows what it’s like to be shot at. The second the bullet slams into his ribs, he knows he’s going to die. It doesn’t hurt as much as he thought it would. He can hear people yelling, more gunfire, but it sounds tinny and distorted. His heart trips, stuttering, to a halt as darkness swallows him for what he assumes is the last time. Thomas Anderson dies on 5th May, 9:12 am, from a gunshot wound to the chest. 

He wakes up, gasping for air, in his own bed, no blood anywhere to be seen. His hands shake and he swallows bile, fumbling for his mobile to check the time. The readout gives him pause: 16th April, 10:42 pm. Sarah Kay is going to die in one hour and twelve minutes. Tom decides to see if what he remembers is true. He manages to save her, this time. It is not, however, something he can explain to his superiors. He gets himself arrested as an accomplice for his trouble. 

Thomas Anderson dies on the 18th of April, 3:04 am, beaten to death by his so-called accomplice. 

He wakes up, gasping, in his own bed, 16th April, 10:42 pm. 

Tom decides to let everything play out exactly as it did before it started repeating. Jimmy Tyler shoots him in the face this time. 

Tom kills Spector at various points a total of seventeen times. He is beginning to think something is very wrong with him. (He also fucks the man once, out of a morbid sense of curiosity. Spector is, actually, not a bad lay. Or he wouldn’t be, if not for the whole strangling thing. Ah well. He’ll live.) 

He shags Sally Ann twice in the same loop. She’s a bit sweet and sad about it the first time, which isn’t what he wants. He makes sure to piss her off the second time and she is _wonderfully_ rough with him. Much more his style. Spector walks in on them fucking that time and kills him again. Oops. 

He politely declines Stella’s offer of a shag in favor of walking home. He gets hit by a lorry. God fucking dammit. 

Tom accepts Stella’s offer, with the suggestion that Reed could join them. The sex is glorious, but he dies the next morning anyway. 

He sucks James Olson off in one of the conference rooms at work, the door unlocked so anyone could walk in and find them. He suspects Olson gets off on it. He gets into another car accident on his way home. 

He shags Olson’s wife Claire, curious about what James is giving up, and finds out that Claire is both an absolutely _fantastic_ lay and that her and her husband have an open relationship. The idea intrigues him, and he repeats the experience three times in as many loops just because he can. The third time, they convince him to have sex with both of them. In the park. ...On an unrelated note, he might have a thing for doing it outside now. (He gets hit by a car for the _twelfth_ time, which is honestly getting annoying. Watch the bloody road, you idiots!) 

He _somehow_ manages to convince Jimmy Tyler to fuck him. If he’s being honest, he doesn't know how that even happened. Tyler is very rough, to the point where it hurts too much to be fun anymore (to the point where he doesn’t _want_ this anymore, get off, get off, _get off_!) and a few of his bones get broken. One of his ribs cracks under Tyler’s hands and punctures his heart. 

He wakes up crying, and calls in sick for a week. Dani pulls him out of his bed (where it’s _safe_ ) and begs him to tell her what’s wrong over a shared bottle of brandy. He tells her everything, breathlessly, more drunk than he’s been in his entire life, terrified that he’s never going to get out of this fucking loop. She hugs him close like he hasn’t been since his mother died and tells him they’re going to figure it out. He gets sent to a psychiatric hospital in the morning, and feels vaguely betrayed even as he jumps off the hospital roof. 

It is the first time he kills himself. (It is not the _last_ , by any means.) 


	2. The Impact

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is... dark. Read at your own risk.

He is sitting in a meeting about... something. Probably Spector, only they don't know that yet because it hasn't happened yet for everyone except him. He is sitting in a meeting and suddenly his mother is standing there, right next to Gibson. “ _Mo chuisle, Tom_ _á_ _s,_ ” she says. Thank fuck she doesn't look like she did when, well. When. Tom turns to Reed.

“Do you see that woman, standing there? Next to Gibson, dark hair, tall?” Reed just looks at him like he's gone mad. He starts laughing, can't help himself.

Somebody's asking him something, but they're drowned out over his mother's, “ _Sh'ma Yisrael, Adonai Eloheinu._ ” Tom puts his gun in his mouth, still laughing.

He wakes up screaming.

He saves Sarah Kay, again, a bit more discreetly this time. He jumps off a bridge immediately after ending the phone call. He wakes up.

He finds Rose Stagg early. He walks onto the train tracks. He wakes up.

“Little Tommy Anderson, what are you doing here after all these years?”

“Do you believe in hell, Rabbi? Can a man be in his own personal hell, without anyone else knowing that they're a part of it?”

He opens his wrists with near-surgical precision.

“Can I help you, young man?”

“Do you believe in hell, Father?”

_Sh'ma Yisrael, Adonai Eloheinu, Adonai Echad_

_Áve María, grátia pléna_

He builds a bomb and straps it to his chest. He goes to an abandoned car park, though. He doesn't want to create any casualties, just in case it sticks this time.

_V'ahavta eit Adonai Elohecha_

_Et benedictus fructus_

He gives himself alcohol poisoning.

“Do you believe in hell?”

“The fuck kind of... are you alright, mate?”

_asher hotseiti etchem meierets Mitsrayim_

None of it works, except...

Tom has a shiny, gnarled burn scar in the middle of his chest, like an imploding star. Twin lines on his wrists. A jagged thing just under his hairline on the left side. An ache in his bones, like he fell and landed badly. His stomach hurts, just a little.

_Sancta Maria, Mater Dei._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just in case it was unclear, and because the tags are not cooperating, Tom's mom was Jewish but his father was Catholic, which... must've made for some interesting family reunions. The prayers in italics are taken from the transliteration of the Shema and the latin translation of the Hail Mary. Please let me know if I got those wrong, as I am neither Jewish, Catholic, or a linguist. And "mo chuisle" is Gaeilge (sp?) for "my pulse" and can (I think, again, not a linguist) be used as an endearment.


End file.
